on the AMC Eagle:

(transcribed from a high school creative writing assignment, and brought to new relevance by Nike6 and Adam Haynes. GET OUT OF MY HEAD, NIKE!)

Ever since I can remember I've wanted an AMC Eagle-- everyone's favorite four-wheel-drive station wagon, and the inspiration for almost all of Subaru's models for the past thirty years. When I was growing up, a friend of the family had one. I can barely remember riding in it, but I'm fairly certain it was an experience terrifying enough to repress-- roaring down the interstate at eighty miles an hour tethered to the road, barely, by four dryrotted Coopers, heat blasting so the poor thing didn't blow its headgasket.

The AMC Eagle is not a pretty car. It's not even remotely good looking. In fact, it resembles a Ford LTD wagon which ran up on a a jersey barrier at a high rate of speed, severed both axles, some how displaced the body of a Jeep Commando, and is now flying fender flares fifteen inches off the ground. Every Eagle I have ever seen (save the $X4) was brown. Poop brown. Faded clearcoat, oxidized, never seen any polish brown.

But I want a black one. Flat black, with the 308CI V8, double four barrell Holley's, and an Easton supercharger. Like Mad Max's car, only four-wheel-drive, and capable of carrying eight kids to school, soccer, and across the Serengeti, with room to spare for groceries.